Radioactive dating conflict
There are behaviours and situations that get presented in relationships that signal that you need to opt out or at minimum, slow down and address the situation before proceeding.What I’m about to explain are what typically make you incompatible, or signal a particularly unhealthy relationship or that there are things that you need to address about you.These are the key things that you need to be very aware of and set as your limits.Anything else is down to your own boundaries so it’s important to recognise what has made you uncomfortable in the past and why, what your values are, and ensure that actions match words and that what you’re doing is congruent with who you profess to be.The chief problem that I come across time and again with people faced with code red behaviour is that we don’t do what we’re supposed to – opt out.Instead, we analyse the crapola out of it, blame ourselves, minimize the extent of the problem, assume we know better (we don’t), or decide that us and our love make us the exception to the rule.They start out with small stuff and then bit by bit increase their level of input.
Bulk of communication by text and email etc – These lazy forms of communication are code amber.
If you’re emotionally invested, or think you’re in a relationship, it’s code red.
Nasty and spiteful – Mean spirited people don’t stop being so in a relationship and may attack your self esteem by latching on to what they think are flaws in you.
Many of us also see the perfect opportunity to be an emotional airbag or to fix, heal, help – we end up on a pedestal.
Even when confronted with code amber behaviour, we don’t process the information, pause, access what it means to us and the relationship that we have in mind or our vision of the other person.